The most important factor for long-term health isn't a supplement or a specific diet—it's mental work. Developing a strong, resilient mindset can enhance quality of life far beyond physical health alone. By understanding and reframing situations, individuals can take responsibility for their emotions, improve communication, and create more meaningful relationships. This mental development not only strengthens personal well-being but also helps in navigating life's inevitable challenges.

Effective communication is key to success, and tailoring messages to how others process information is essential. Recognizing different learning styles and love languages allows for better connection and understanding in relationships. Cultivating a peaceful environment at home, along with practicing gratitude, fosters positivity and mental growth. Ultimately, investing in mental health is the most impactful thing you can do for overall well-being and happiness.

Highlights of the Podcast

00:03 - Introduction to Common Health Questions
00:40 - The Importance of Mental Work
01:21 - Taking Responsibility for Your Emotions
02:43 - Effective Communication and Learning Styles
05:32 - Love Languages and Relationship Communication
07:49 - Creating a Peaceful Home Environment
09:07 - Reframing Situations for Mental Growth
10:25 - The Power of Gratitude and Mental Shifts
12:33 - Mental Development as the Key to Long-term Health

Dr Matt Chalmers [00:00:03] I get this phone a lot. Usually it's what's the best supplement, What's the best diet? What's the best? This one was just what the question is. What's the most important thing for health overall? Again, this is this is my personal belief. I'm a quality of life guy. I'm not necessarily a natural guy. I am a quality of life guy. And I can tell you that the thing that will increase your quality of life more than anything else, any supplement to anything else is mental work. If you if you can get your mind. Into the right position where you understand things better and you can manipulate your environment. It is that's that's really all that matters. You know, you can be a little sick like health wise and put your mind to work properly and everything's fine. Your body will break down like, you know, no matter who you are. Like you look at Ronnie Coleman, right? We're the greatest bodybuilders we've ever seen. Dude has problems walking now. No regrets. Your body is going to break down. You're going to get old. It's going to break down. But your mind, as long as your mind is functioning, you are who you are. And it's important for relationships.

Dr Matt Chalmers [00:01:21] You know, it's important for everything else because you have to understand that that's a very personal you thing. You can't have somebody else do it. It's like it's like building a body, like you can't have something else do it. You've got to do it. Like you've got to go through the steps. You've got to go through the work. You have to understand that a lot of your world that is angering you, that is Miss, Miss working. That is not good, is your fault, which is good because if it's your fault, you can fix it because it's you, which I think is the biggest thing. People are like, That's my fault, you know, angry. It's like, hold on, Wait, this is my fault, so I can fix this without you. Perfect. Let's fix this. A lot of times you go in a relationship, you find out that you're talking past each other. Like I said, this thing and you heard that thing and you said this thing and I heard that thing. And so we're we're not communicating properly. We're speaking to each other, but we're not communicating. And if you take a step back and you're like, all right, hold on, I have a message I'm trying to give that person, It is my job, my responsibility. It's my fault if they don't get the message the way I intended it, because I'm sending something if you don't get it the way I tried to send it. There's nothing you can do about that. So because I'm trying to give you an idea and take it from here and put it in your head exactly the same way it's in mine.

Dr Matt Chalmers [00:02:43] But if I if I have to contort it and crush it and shove it through a hole, your body is not going to recognize it the exact same way it's in your head. So delivering that message is up to you. And there's lots of little things you can do about that. You can be like, All right, fine. I have to figure out how to communicate with you. If you are a visual learner and I'm an auditory learner. I have to take this concept, this idea, this this thing I'm trying to do, and I've got to change it so that when I deliver it to you, you accept it in a way that I meant it so that you can you can take this information and assimilate it that's best for you and move on. And you were like, that's that's just way too much work. You do it for your kids all the time, but you love your kids. So it's one of the things that you do like because you're like, well, I'm so much more mature and I'm so much more advanced. I'm so smarter than my children are. I have to work this message down in a way where I understand it. You do? And that's I'm not arguing that, but you also have to do it with everyone else you talk to. Because if they if they take in information differently than you, like everybody's when I know a lot of do or understand that. Auditory learners, visual learners and Kazakh learners exist and they might not know it in those terms, but for instance, you might be one of the few who are like, Yeah, if I hear something, I'll remember it or something, because I can't just go to a lecture. I got to take notes. Well, if you've got to take notes, if you have to physically do something, you're more kinesthetic. If you see something, you remember it. Great.

Dr Matt Chalmers [00:04:16] So, for instance, some people can watch a movie and then remember the entire movie. They hear a lecture. They can't remember very much of it because they're visual learners, not auditory learners. So there's there's some people who can do pretty well with all of them. But what you have to understand is that the vast majority of us lean on one of those things more than another. So if you're an auditory like if you can just if you listen to a book or you listen to a lecture and you retain a giant amount of information and you're talking to somebody who doesn't, they've got to take notes. If you try to tell them to watch the stuff, the person has to take notes. They're not going to get it because that's not how they receive information. You have to send the information in a manner where they receive it best because you're the one communicating to them. So that's one of the big things. As soon as you start to understand that, you go, okay, now that I have this new worldview of I have to respond, I've got to send the information to you the way you you receive it to get the information, the message across. You take that responsibility on yourself. Now all of a sudden you can listen to people and not just hear what they say, but you can listen to how they're saying it. And so you're like, okay, now I know how to communicate with you. Now I know how I need to do this.

Dr Matt Chalmers [00:05:32] This is the whole thing with the love languages right now. You know, I talk about that all the time. You know, there are certain people who, when they have physical touch that have sex, they hold hands. That's a thing. That's how they feel, loved and appreciated and wanted. And some people, you have to tell them your hair looks pretty today. And some people, you just do something for them and they respect that time and energy you took. And that's how they feel loved because you're trying again, this is all about communication. You're trying to communicate an idea to that other person, right? You're trying to tell them, Hey, look, you're important to me. I care about you, I love you like all those other things. Now, doing it in a manner that they they perceive love and attention and and function is the best way to do it. Because at that point now you're doing something for somebody. They recognize what you've done for them and they go, this is fantastic. This makes me feel very, very, very, very touched. It makes you feel important, makes you feel respected. It makes you feel love. That's the thing.

Dr Matt Chalmers [00:06:34] And what's weird is that a lot of people I talked to guys about this all the time. Guys are a bit easier because as long as you can get that their partner to do the sex thing. Vast majority of guys pretty much cover. But you got to go to a movie like, Look, she needs you to tell her that she's pretty every day and guys are like, I silly. I told you yesterday, I know she did it again today or you need to do this thing for her. Yeah. You know, and I guess one of them people are always like, so I got a buyer register, write a note, get her a $2 thing that you saw at the gas station that made you think of her. The gifts thing is, is a physical representation of I was thinking about you all that that's basically what a gift is. It's like, Hey, I saw this thing and it made me think of you because you're on my mind all the time. And that's the important thing. So here's a little statue of a little figure of of because, you know, you're a big Star Wars person, that type of a thing. I saw this meal and everything you because you're always on my mind. That's what the gifts thing is. And so when you start boiling down this what does this actually mean? Like, why do they need this thing? You know, that gets into a lot of really fun stuff. But on the surface level, that's a big piece of communication.

Dr Matt Chalmers [00:07:49] So if you can create you know, I talked about this a lot, especially in relationship function. If you can create a center, a piece where, you know, you go out in the world and you get your teeth kicked in and everything's hard when you're out in the storm and you come home to a safe harbor of peace and love and kindness, you can weather anything because you have that. You have that place to get recharge and regenerate. If you don't create an environment of peace, life is going to be hard. So if you can create that, that center of peace in your head so that now whenever you see things, your body is geared towards positivity, it is geared towards light and function and happiness and things like that, which is not terribly difficult to do. Now every time you go do something. Your mind is in a better place. You're more calm when someone's communicating with you. Maybe when they come at you with anger, you can understand. Okay. You're not mad at me. You're mad at a communications thing. You're mad at this thing over here. You're projecting an issue that you've got at home. Like, you can start to understand things a lot better. The more mental work you do, the more you more understanding of situation function you get, the better everything gets.

Dr Matt Chalmers [00:09:07] So you know that that would be the thing I would tell you is that the mental work, the mental piece. Mental development piece is by far the most important thing you can do for long term health and just long term quality of life. So that would be it. Like when we do mental work, that's kind of what we're doing is we're reframing situations. And it's I always tell people my the most. Not dangerous, but the most impactful thing to your life that we're going to do is the mental work, because you can take supplements and if you stop doing the solvents, you go back to where you were. Once you open up that mind and you understand things and you see things for the first time, that's it. You don't go back. Like once you understand, this person who's acting this way, or when I act this way, it's really because of these things. You start to understand that you go, my gosh, you start seeing it everywhere. And that's kind of the idea with, you know, unconscious realization. For instance, if you were to be put into the unconscious mind to your subconscious, every once, it becomes more prevalent in the conscious. So for instance, I use the Blue Corvette example a lot when you start deciding, Man, I really like the blue, blue, blue Corvette.

Dr Matt Chalmers [00:10:25] I really think I'm going to get a new blue Corvette. All of a sudden you start seeing blue Corvette that you never saw before. It's not because they weren't there. It's because you weren't attuned to think about them or look for them or put them on your radar. Now that they're on your radar, you see them everywhere. Well, you can use the same idea for pretty much anything. And so if you start, you know, like that's what you do with gratitude, the way we do gratitude now, all day long, you're trying to come up with things unconsciously, something you're happy about. That made me happy. And then immediately you go, that should be one of my gratitude things. Jot that down. And so you're consciously or unconsciously looking for them. And so as they come up more and more and more and more, all of a sudden what happens is you're like, Man, my life is pretty good. There's a lot of things that I came up with today that I'm grateful for. That's exactly the point. Like saying it morning at night. It's not that's not the point. The point is you shift your unconscious mind to consciously or unconsciously be looking for those things. And so when they happen, you go, look, here it is. And I've had so many people say just this one little thing I really start doing.

Dr Matt Chalmers [00:11:28] I think I'm going to go, My wife's actually pretty good guys. There's all these things like I've just been looking forward, there's all these things I'm actually pretty grateful for and I'm like, Yeah, that was on point. So it's little things like that if you can get your mind shifted. So we're looking for positive things. We're trying to find positive things, we're trying to find ways of communicating with somebody else. We understand that a lot of our problems are our fault, which is actually a good thing because we can fix things are our fault. If it's painful, I can't fix. I think I'd have to fix that now. I can. I can do carrot and stick. I can do like if you do this, I'll give you all this stuff. Or if you don't do this, I'll beat you with a stick, whatever it is. But let's. Let's do it. The thing is, if it's your fault, you can do it whenever you want to. So that's why, that's why reframing that that viewpoint is really important. So the thing that I would tell you is the most important thing you can do for long term quality of life is the mental work is get, get in, getting ahead, figure out where things are going and pull it apart and put it back together in a way that works for you.

Dr Matt Chalmers [00:12:33] So that would be the thing I would tell you more than anything is the most important thing you can do. We do stuff like that, right? There's all sorts of different psychology things that we that show you work with you and philosophy things we show you. It's not really therapy. It's just a it's a it's it's a new way of looking at your life and doing stuff. So, I mean, and it will help you a lot. A lot because you can now communicate better. But you know, it's not really I wouldn't call it therapy, but that's kind of what we do. We do all that love, that mental work of reframing situations and taking responsibility. That means taking control and building yourself back in a position where you own basically all the function of your mental life. So that's it. I would tell you that that's the best thing to do is to work on that mental piece because it's going to make you make the biggest pieces, biggest change for you no matter where you go. Thanks for your time. Have a nice day.

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Dr. Matt Chalmers

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